Sink or Swim.

Swimming in the sea of uncertainty.
Overwhelmed and drowning in choices of the present and for the future.
Slowly feeling being pulled under by the current of indecision.
QUICK!
What are you going to do?
Sink or Swim?

Dreams.

Dreams.

Dreams are 50/50.
They either come to fruition or shatter.
I find that if my dreams include other people in order to grow,
I may as well be trying to hold ashes in the wind.
Perhaps dreams are only for entertainment purposes.

Sleep Dreams.

I asked for the dreams to stop.
Why was I having these dreams about other peoples lives out of the blue?
Why them? Why me?
I had asked for the dreams to stop.
Now all dreams have ceased.
Now I think I miss dreaming, and need to ask for them back.
I need dreams of myself.
Without dreams, life seems dull.

Emotions.

Why am I so bad at them?

Love. Hate. Jealousy. Sadness.
Melancholy. Loneliness. Compassion. Confusion.
Happy. Cold. Icy. Mean.
Hopeful. Dreary.
Tired. Cold. Tired, Cold.
Content. Non Content. Excitement. Anger.
Elated. Pleased. Unhappy. Saddened.
Proud. Disappointed. Failure. Accomplishment.

I am just not good at emotions.
I don't want to share them with everyone.
It seems whenever I have, it comes back at me negatively.
Sadly, I think I have taught my children this behavior.
Failure and disappointment are knotted in my stomach.
I wish I could just throw up and get rid of it.
Flush it away, and not deal with it.

written 11.16.07

Mingle in the Moonlight.

Our souls mingle in the moonlight as we slumber.
Entwined we dance in the clouds.
Stars twinkling all around us.
Like the twinkle in your eyes when you say "I love you"
Like the twinkle in your smile when I say it back.
Constellations join in the waltz.
We all move in perfect time to the beat of my heart.
I awaken and my soul is saddened that it has to end, until we slumber again.

My Love

My love shines in the first morning sun.
My love sings in the birds songs.
My love blows in the gentle wind.
My love is fragrant in the first spring flowers.
My love flows in the river towards the ocean.
My love radiates through the waterfall you gaze at.
My love grows in the mighty trees in the forest.
My love drifts in the clouds above you.
My love is in the warmth from the sun on your face.
My love is peaceful in the meadow.
My love runs with the animals in the wild.
My love falls gently on your face with the rain.
My love roars with the waves of the ocean.
My love beams in the moonlight.
My love twinkles with the stars.
My love is endless like time.
My love is all around you to take.
Do you feel it?